That’s it.

I’m tired of registering as an Athena and being stuck in the last wave.

You know, when I compare my times in the Athena category vs my age group, I usually place better (well, further away from last) in age group.

Okay, we all know that I will never be competitive even within my age group unless only 3 women including myself are in it. I mean, the fastest I’ve EVER run per mile, and this was when I was 20 years old, and skinny, and running twice a day while at Camp Buckner yearling (sophomore) summer at West Point (running twice per day, mind you, because I was a REMEDIAL runner) (not to forget all the running through the woods pretending to be infantry) was about a 7:40ish pace.

I’d love love love to get to that again. Shit, I’d love to be sub 9. Hell, sub 10 or sub 11 even. I think I can eventually get to sub 9 minute miles. Eventually.

Regardless, even though being in the last wave means you have time for an extra port-a-potty visit, I really don’t like starting last. Psychologically, it give me far too much time to dwell on things like a) big surf b) how tight my wetsuit is and c) they’re going to be out of food by the time I finish.

So anyway, after Malibu and the condom cap incident I’d decided not to register as an Athena anymore, but, as I’d already registered for Day at the Beach as an Athena, it was too late to change.

At least the swim cap for tomorrow is gold as opposed to latex condom. (That’s the other thing I’m wondering: do they save the grossest color for us in the last wave? Come on, guys: I would’ve really appreciated the pretty lilac cap Dave got for Malibu. Trust me, he couldn’t care less.)